Gay Life – The Paulinator: Change of Heart

gay marriage

To quote the great (and surprisingly missing) pop diva, Christina Aguilera’s song What a Girl Wants:

Say if you love something let it go
If it comes back, it’s yours
That’s how you know
It’s for keeps yeah, it’s for sure

Well, maybe not. You see, I set Hot Bartender free for an entire month and lo and behold, he came back to me. His initial text message after my month of sobriety came as a shock to me and I thought for a second things could work out between the two of us. When we finally met outside of the bar for our walk around the town, I felt like we made progress. Then when I saw him twice following our rendezvous in two different places of work, I still felt good about our situation. Congrats to the Paulinator, for it seems something was going right in the romance department. That was until I saw Hot Bartender macking with other guys.

Obviously I know this comes with the territory, but when I went for my just desserts with him, I got nothing… well, technically I got “Aww, you’re cute” followed by awkward silence followed by me “Ok, I think it’s time for me to go…” So now the saying “Fool me once shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me” comes into play and as sad as I was to see it leave the pier, the Hot Bartender ship has sailed and I was not on board.

The old Paulinator would have decided to jump back into the old ways and start sleeping his way through Manhattan again, but this new-and-improved Paulinator seems to be doing things a bit differently.  I’ve decided to focus a lot of my new energy into spreading the word that gay marriage is a good thing and that the New York State Senate should vote YES on the Marriage Equality Bill (S:4401). I recently attended the Broadway Impact’s Action = Equality Rally on May 17th. Having just passed my one year “out of the closet” anniversary in March I am still in awe at how much I have come to admire other people’s stories. Hearing Cynthia Nixon talk about her partner, their family and the civil laws they are denied because they are not allowed to get married, brought tears to my eyes. Hearing the cast of Broadway’s Hair sing “Let the sun shine in…” and see that the clouds parted just enough to have the sun shine in… gave me goosebumps.  And seeing Eric Sciotto, David Eggers and Samson Sciotto-Eggers showcase what a family made with love looks like filled my heart with hope. If you haven’t had a chance and would like to contact your state Sentator, please visit the web site and check out the ridiculously easy steps to contact them and get involved!

I may not be fighting to marry someone right away, but when I find that special someone, I truly hope I have the option to marry them, in any state I choose!

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